Can be summed up in one word, Insanity.
It would be a very brave and confident driver to hire a car and drive yourself in Egypt. I have already told you dear reader about our adventure trying to obtain petrol. Having now spent a week in the country I think I have learnt the many rules of the road to help you and they are:
1 Wherever possible drive on the shady side of the street.
2 wherever possible do not use your headlights at night - only taxi drivers, minibus drivers and motorcyclist can ignore this rule and use multi coloured flashing LED lights on the front of the vehicle instead. It is always permissible to drive the wrong way along a four lane carriageway at night without lights.
3. Ignore all road signs, the only person to take note of is the man in the black uniform casually toting an AK47
4 A family with up to four kids can travel on a motorbike provided the mother rides side saddle
5. Boys of 12 may drive a motorcycle provided they don’t wear a crash helmet in fact no motorcyclist should wear a crash helmet.
6. Up to 7 live camels will fit onto the back of a pickup truck, provided they are kneeling down and securely roped in only allowing their heads to bob up and down.
7. Always take the shortest possible route especially at roundabouts and ignore the meridian at all times.
8. Your driver will have the knowledge of where all the sleeping policemen in the entire countryside are situated, even if they are invisible with no signs when you approach them, how high they are and whether they will rip the exhaust from underneath your vehicle
9. A tractor tyre in the centre of the road is a traffic island and gives you permission to drive either side of it especially if you wish to overtake the car that had been in front of you
10. Pedestrians are to be hooted at, driven very close to and generally ignored unless they step in front of you in which case hoot even louder and shout.
11 It is permissible at all times to stop anywhere in the middle of the road to chat with pedestrians or shop keepers.
12 Insurance and seatbelts are for sissies.
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